The classic one - How many bulbs?
How many Malayalees do you need to change a lightbulb?
Infinite number.. One to change the bulb, 20 to form the light bulb workers' union (Marxist), 30 to form the counter union (CPI), 1 to be the Light bulb minister, 1 to head the Light bulb corporation, 45 to be nominated to the light bulb corporation, 60 to go to US,Germany, Switzerland and Hawaii to do import product survey on light bulb, 3 to form the Judicial Enquiry commission on light bulb scandal.... so on.... (BTW, Kerala Marxists anyway believe that you don't have to change light bulbs.. A light bulb has seeds of its own revolution....)
Mallus are first
Mallus have been and are among India's most widely spread community. If anyone needs proof then all they need do is look into NASA archives. As Neil Armstrong was about to say "One small step...", a Kaka came out of his shaap, and called his boy.. "Yada.. randu chaaya.". So much so for Armstrong being the first man on the moon. Mallus were there first!
Is Bruce Lee a Malaya Lee?
What is Bruce Lee's favorite weapon?
----- Kodaa Lee
According to Bruce Lee, which is the Venomous snake?
----- Ana Lee
Place where Bruce Lee stays when he is in Kerala
----- Adima Lee
Bruce Lee's Favorite Malayalam Channel
----- Kaira Lee
Bruce Lee favorite vegitable?
----- Thakkaa Lee
What sound does Bruce Lee make when some one hits him?
----- Nilavi Lee
What is Bruce Lee's pet
------ Chunde Lee
What kind of water does Bruce Lee prefer with his lunch?
------ Karingaa Lee
What is Bruce Lee's Girl Friend's name?
------ Anaarka Lee
What is Bruce Lee's nick name?
------ Neeraa Lee
While in kerala he likes to be known
------ Malaya Lee
Pazham Chollu a.k.a Banana Talk Contributed by Prem Kumar
Whitening applied becomes white scars.
(Velukkan thechathu pandayi)
When talking, hear. When given, eat.
(Paraymbol kelkkanam.tharumbol thinnanam)
Give elephant, but not hope.
(Aana koduthalum aasha kodukaruthu)
If Crow bath, become crane ??
(Kaaka kulichal kokku aagumo??)
If needed jackfruit on root grow.
(Venamengil chakka verilum kaayikkum)
Snake on fence on shoulder no put.
(Veliyil kidanna paambine eduthu tholil idaruthu)
Onam come or Baby born, porridge for KORAN still in leaf.
(Onam vannaalum Unni pirannaalum, Koranu Kanji Kumbilil thanne)
Own baby, for crow, golden baby.
(Kaakkakku Than Kunju Ponkunju)
Market fail Mother's back.
(Angaadiyil thottathinu Ammayude purathu)
Silent Cat Breaks Pot.
(Mindaa Poocha Kalam Udakkum)
Sand leaning man took girl.
(Mannum Chaari Ninnavan Pennum Kondupoyi)
Centipede if put on mattress goes to garbage.
(Attaye pidichu Methayil Kidathiyaalum Athu pokum Kuppa kuzhiyil)
Miser hold umbrella at midnight.
(Alpan Ardha Raathriyilum koda Pidikkum)
Foot wrong elephant will also fall.
(Adi thettiyaal aaneyum veezhum)
Friend of Eeenaampechi is TreeDog.
(Eeenaampechi-kku kootu marapatti)
In desert one Tree green.
(Marubhumiyil oru marupacha)
Sitting to moan, dog's head, coconut fell.
(Moangan irunna naayudey thalayil thenga veenu)
Different drop big water.
(Palathulli peruvellam)
Sunday, December 26, 2004
God and You
God : Hello. Did you call me?
Me : Called you? No.. who is this?
God : This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I
thought I will chat.
Me : I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am
actually busy now. I
am in
the midst of something.
God : What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.
Me : Don't know. But I cant find free time. Life has
become hectic.
It's
rush hour all the time.
God : Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity
gets you
results.
Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.
Me : I understand. But I still cant figure out. By the
way, I was
not
expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging
chat.
God : Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time,
by giving you
some
clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you
through the
medium you
are comfortable with.
Me : Tell me, why has life become complicated
now?
God : Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is
what makes it
complicated.
Me : why are we then constantly unhappy?
God : Your today is the tomorrow that you worried
about yesterday.You
are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying
has become
your habit.
That's why you are not happy.
Me : But how can we not worry when there is so
much uncertainty?
God : Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is
optional.
Me : But then, there is so much pain due to
uncertainty..
God : Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
Me : If suffering is optional, why do good people
always suffer?
God : Diamonds cannot be polished without
friction. Gold cannot be
purified without fire. Good people go through
trials, but don't
suffer.
With that experience their lives become better not
bitter.
Me : You mean to say such experience is useful?
God : Yes. In every terms, Experience is a hard
teacher. She gives
the
test first and the lessons afterwards.
Me : But still, why should we go through such
tests? Why cant we be
free
from problems?
God : PROBLEMS are Purposeful Roadblocks
Offering Beneficial Lessons
(to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength
comes from
struggle and
endurance, not when you are free from problems.
Me : Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we
don't know where
we
are heading..
God : If you look outside you will not know where
you are heading
.Look
inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking
inside, you awaken.
Eyes
provide sight. Heart provides insight.
Me : Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to
hurt more than moving in
the
right direction. What should I do?
God : Success is a measure as decided by
others. Satisfaction is a
measure as decided by you.
Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than
knowing you rode
ahead.
You work with the compass. Let others work with
the clock.
Me : In tough times, how do you stay motivated?
God : Always look at how far you have come
rather than how far you
have
to go. Always count your blessing, not what you
are missing.
Me : What surprises you about people?
God : when they suffer they ask, "why me?" When
they prosper, they
never ask "Why me" Everyone wishes to have
truth on t heir
side,
but few want to be on the side of the truth
Me : Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here. I
cant get the
answer.
God : Seek not to find who you are, but to
determine who you want to
be.
Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are
here. Create it.
Life is
not a process of discovery but a process of
creation.
Me : How can I get the best out of life?
God : Face your past without regret. Handle your
present with
confidence.
Me : Called you? No.. who is this?
God : This is GOD. I heard your prayers. So I
thought I will chat.
Me : I do pray. Just makes me feel good. I am
actually busy now. I
am in
the midst of something.
God : What are you busy at? Ants are busy too.
Me : Don't know. But I cant find free time. Life has
become hectic.
It's
rush hour all the time.
God : Sure. Activity gets you busy. But productivity
gets you
results.
Activity consumes time. Productivity frees it.
Me : I understand. But I still cant figure out. By the
way, I was
not
expecting YOU to buzz me on instant messaging
chat.
God : Well I wanted to resolve your fight for time,
by giving you
some
clarity. In this net era, I wanted to reach you
through the
medium you
are comfortable with.
Me : Tell me, why has life become complicated
now?
God : Stop analyzing life. Just live it. Analysis is
what makes it
complicated.
Me : why are we then constantly unhappy?
God : Your today is the tomorrow that you worried
about yesterday.You
are worrying because you are analyzing. Worrying
has become
your habit.
That's why you are not happy.
Me : But how can we not worry when there is so
much uncertainty?
God : Uncertainty is inevitable, but worrying is
optional.
Me : But then, there is so much pain due to
uncertainty..
God : Pain is inevitable, but suffering is optional.
Me : If suffering is optional, why do good people
always suffer?
God : Diamonds cannot be polished without
friction. Gold cannot be
purified without fire. Good people go through
trials, but don't
suffer.
With that experience their lives become better not
bitter.
Me : You mean to say such experience is useful?
God : Yes. In every terms, Experience is a hard
teacher. She gives
the
test first and the lessons afterwards.
Me : But still, why should we go through such
tests? Why cant we be
free
from problems?
God : PROBLEMS are Purposeful Roadblocks
Offering Beneficial Lessons
(to) Enhance Mental Strength. Inner strength
comes from
struggle and
endurance, not when you are free from problems.
Me : Frankly in the midst of so many problems, we
don't know where
we
are heading..
God : If you look outside you will not know where
you are heading
.Look
inside. Looking outside, you dream. Looking
inside, you awaken.
Eyes
provide sight. Heart provides insight.
Me : Sometimes not succeeding fast seems to
hurt more than moving in
the
right direction. What should I do?
God : Success is a measure as decided by
others. Satisfaction is a
measure as decided by you.
Knowing the road ahead is more satisfying than
knowing you rode
ahead.
You work with the compass. Let others work with
the clock.
Me : In tough times, how do you stay motivated?
God : Always look at how far you have come
rather than how far you
have
to go. Always count your blessing, not what you
are missing.
Me : What surprises you about people?
God : when they suffer they ask, "why me?" When
they prosper, they
never ask "Why me" Everyone wishes to have
truth on t heir
side,
but few want to be on the side of the truth
Me : Sometimes I ask, who am I, why am I here. I
cant get the
answer.
God : Seek not to find who you are, but to
determine who you want to
be.
Stop looking for a purpose as to why you are
here. Create it.
Life is
not a process of discovery but a process of
creation.
Me : How can I get the best out of life?
God : Face your past without regret. Handle your
present with
confidence.
Saturday, December 25, 2004
The proud Indians
It hit me how proud we Indians are a few days back. Someone posted in the ABM forum that they were looking for this girl who stayed with them almost 40 years ago. They know she was from Malaysia and hails from Bangalore...
Warning bells started to ring as i though this was another one of those ignorant Americans. But she insisted the girl was from Malaysia and so i promised i would do my best to find her. Before i asked anyone i decided to take the simpler methods, i searched the white pages but to no avail i found nobody with such a name.
So i decided to search this lady's name on Google. They were only 3 hits. And the very 1st one believe or not was a post from this lady. She actually gave her whole life story in this post, from which schools she attended, what degree she got from which uni. It seemed like a very short resume to me...
I understand if your proud that you achieved something but having the need to show it off to every single person in the world by posting it on the internet????? I mean how lame can you get? Needless to say her email address and probably the rest of her contact details were all there( i was too cheesed off to read more than i needed to).
It REALLY makes you think doesnt it.
Warning bells started to ring as i though this was another one of those ignorant Americans. But she insisted the girl was from Malaysia and so i promised i would do my best to find her. Before i asked anyone i decided to take the simpler methods, i searched the white pages but to no avail i found nobody with such a name.
So i decided to search this lady's name on Google. They were only 3 hits. And the very 1st one believe or not was a post from this lady. She actually gave her whole life story in this post, from which schools she attended, what degree she got from which uni. It seemed like a very short resume to me...
I understand if your proud that you achieved something but having the need to show it off to every single person in the world by posting it on the internet????? I mean how lame can you get? Needless to say her email address and probably the rest of her contact details were all there( i was too cheesed off to read more than i needed to).
It REALLY makes you think doesnt it.
Thursday, December 23, 2004
Wednesday, December 22, 2004
Email Accounts
Hi again.........................................................
Was going through my gmail account earlier and found that i can invite people already. Guess i must have been doing something right. I used up one invite already and have got a couple more available. If anybody is interested do drop me a line and i will consider your request. Oh yeah a small bribe might help as well to speed up your request. Muahahahaha....... I am becoming like the Malaysian goverment heheeheehe...
Speaking of that i am pissed of with the local Telekom. They are very selfish and unhelpful bitches you know. I am talking bout the staff in Seremban telekom. I wanted to downgrade my account and they refused to let me citing silly reasons but when i call up the Streamyx Helpline they say no problem i just have to get the form from Telekom. Since the bitches in Seremban dont wanna give it to me i have to go all the way to KL. Hehehe..... you should have seen the faces of them when i called them stupid bitches right in front of them. Wonder if i slipped some money it would have helped my situation
Damn bitches.......................
Was going through my gmail account earlier and found that i can invite people already. Guess i must have been doing something right. I used up one invite already and have got a couple more available. If anybody is interested do drop me a line and i will consider your request. Oh yeah a small bribe might help as well to speed up your request. Muahahahaha....... I am becoming like the Malaysian goverment heheeheehe...
Speaking of that i am pissed of with the local Telekom. They are very selfish and unhelpful bitches you know. I am talking bout the staff in Seremban telekom. I wanted to downgrade my account and they refused to let me citing silly reasons but when i call up the Streamyx Helpline they say no problem i just have to get the form from Telekom. Since the bitches in Seremban dont wanna give it to me i have to go all the way to KL. Hehehe..... you should have seen the faces of them when i called them stupid bitches right in front of them. Wonder if i slipped some money it would have helped my situation
Damn bitches.......................
My 1st blog
Looks like i am going in to new teritory today. My friend just convinced me to do this. No real theories at the moment. Guess i will have to start advertising this. Wonder if i can make money out of this. Hmmmmmm.....................
Will keep that in mind. What does someone write in a blog anyway??? At the moment all i can think of is LOTR but i guess that's not very appropriate right? Maybe i should take some time to think about it firstly. And how does one advertise this thing anyway?
Oh i cant really help it you know. I just watched the extended version of 'Return of the King'. It was really amazing. Christopher Lee has a bigger part in this version. Although i wish the ending was like in the book but i guess it cant be perfect right? The scenes with Frodo were a lot more bearable ( for me) in this version as well. I thought those scenes in the theatrical version was kinda draggy. Anyway its a lot better than watching the DVD release of Star Wars. Nothing wrong with the movie, just the spoiler in the end. If you dont know what i am talking about go and get it and watch it.
I dont really have any new theories to discuss at the moment but as sson as i do i will post it. Until next time...................................
Will keep that in mind. What does someone write in a blog anyway??? At the moment all i can think of is LOTR but i guess that's not very appropriate right? Maybe i should take some time to think about it firstly. And how does one advertise this thing anyway?
Oh i cant really help it you know. I just watched the extended version of 'Return of the King'. It was really amazing. Christopher Lee has a bigger part in this version. Although i wish the ending was like in the book but i guess it cant be perfect right? The scenes with Frodo were a lot more bearable ( for me) in this version as well. I thought those scenes in the theatrical version was kinda draggy. Anyway its a lot better than watching the DVD release of Star Wars. Nothing wrong with the movie, just the spoiler in the end. If you dont know what i am talking about go and get it and watch it.
I dont really have any new theories to discuss at the moment but as sson as i do i will post it. Until next time...................................
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